THE TRIBAL MAN

THE TRIBAL MAN
By @McChimeFrancis
In my life I have never felt tribalism until this moment, and it didn’t just come in a fold, it came in two folds which I fell victim twice. Personally I felt the second time I shouldn’t be a victim because in the first time I accepted I was a victim in the case. I know you didn’t understand these first few lines. Let me explain.
I was in a commercial bus in Lagos, I was heading home. The bus I entered was a straight bus, a straight bus in the sense that it wouldn’t stop along the way until it got to a certain destination, because of this the driver took in an armed personnel of the Nigerian force which actually is a tradition in Lagos when you are plying such routes. The bus was calm and peaceful until suddenly the armed man began exchanging words with a female passenger. I personally didn’t have an idea about what ensued prior to their argument. All I knew was that the armed man decided to highlight from the bus, telling the young lady who was Igbo to come down which she refused so the armed man decided to look for another bus. The driver was not happy with the development, everyone in the bus weren’t happy too. The story is quite complicated but I just have to be brief and tell you a bit of it.
This recent development, lead to abuses raining on the poor young lady who also didn’t hesitate to reply the other people in the bus-word for word. I already had issues with the lady on my side who was Yoruba because of the way she talked to me like I was one secondary school boy (you how my size is now-small). She insulted the hell out of this young Igbo lady, in fact she insulted the whole Igbos in general, and saying all sought of crude things. There and then I knew tribalism was real. Well when I came down from the bus I wasted no time in telling her that she should go and learn how to talk. It was quite an awful experience. I accepted I was a victim in this one because I was Igbo.
Remember I said it happened in two folds, my second experience happened here in the east where I stay with my course mate. We stay in a compound that consisted of Igbo people who spoke Nsukka-thick Nsukka language which I personally have found it hard to come to term with. so due to this reason the first day the elderly woman in the yard asked me where I was from I claimed to be a Yoruba boy, so that at least this Igbo speaking people who had so much love for their language would at least try and communicate with me in pidgin or English. Well it didn’t turn out that way. I always sang songs with Yoruba lyrics anytime I was moving around the compound or going to have my bath.
The landlord of the yard came around sometime when I wasn’t around and the next day, whole and behold I was summoned by the caretaker of the house and the bombshell was unleashed on me. I was told to leave the yard immediately, because I wasn’t Igbo, because I was Yoruba.
Imagine, An Igbo man telling a fellow Igbo man to pack out of his compound, just because he claimed to be Yoruba. That was the height of tribalism. The man was tribal. I had to correct the impression that I was Igbo and not Yoruba.
Many people today still have deep issues with the phrase “where are you from?”, and they don’t ask themselves the simple question “can you survive without their existence?”
Man is very tribal in nature and we must pray for enlightenment. I cry when I see people in the frontiers of tribal actions, it pains my heart. Even the one Nigeria slogan now sounds like mockery to a certain tribe from another tribe. Can this nation be one? I don’t think so because the hatred for one another is enormous. It is a very deep cut that even when it heals, there exists a big scar. Mcchimefrancis.blogspot.com

THE MAN UNCENSORED

THE MAN UNCENSORED
By @McChimefrancis

Mondays were always hectic days for Rita at her place of work, she would always wake up very early in the morning, and always returned very late at night too. She was fortunate to cope with this lifestyle because she was single.
On this particular day she returned home stressed out, the traffic along Mile2 to Festac gate was much; she had her lunch and Supper while in the bus thanks to the young boys who hawked gala and bottled soft drinks. She was tired today and there was no single energy to make food. She picked up her remote control and turned on the TV set, thanking God that there was power that night. It has been a while her estate had power, as she scrolled through the list of channels she slept off. Rita always put off her phone before she slept but this time tiredness didn’t let her perform her usual ritual. Exactly 12.30am her cell phone rang and she woke up, one eyed closed and the other half-open. She looked at the number that was calling, it was Peter. “Why would Peter be calling at this time?” she asked herself. It was very unusual, she went back to sleep. She was used to so many guys calling her at night though.
Rita had a very long history with male counterparts. She lost her virginity to Yemi, few weeks after her 21st birthday celebration. It all happened with a rush. She didn’t enjoy the sex and flex anyway. It was her first time and it wasn’t to be remembered, because it wasn’t fun at all that night. All she could remember was too black bodies entangled in darkness, Yemi thrusting hard and she laying on her back asking herself when would all this end. She even faked her moaning that night. Rita gave out her body for no cost, she made love to anyone she felt like making love to, she wasn’t a lesbian though, she didn’t get paid for sex too. She was the kind of lady who wasn’t ready to be committed to any guy, all her life she tried committing to three guys but to no avail, she didn’t find commitment worthy.
Rita was very popular in school because she was a good orator, and she was also into public speaking. Her voice on the microphone had this melody that could turn one on. So many guys loved her. Guys also loved her because she was beautiful, she was fair as the moon, bright as the sun,  she had pink lips and curved hips. Her buttocks were round. She had a good fashion sense. There was no nudity in her dressing, she never showed her cleavages, and neither did she put on miniskirts to show her yellow laps. She had a hot body.
Rita never missed church activities, she was always involved in the planning of many events and she was in the dramatizing wing of the church. All this she was while she was a student of the only university in Nigeria, the University of Nigeria, Nsukka.
Rita was now 24, working at a PR firm. Her body got her the job anyway. She didn’t have to sleep with the manager to get the job; her seductive nature and trickery paved the way for her-let’s say she fooled the manager. She was also suited for the job, she ticked all the boxes, and as a graduate of UNN, she was naturally ahead of the other applicants. This was the job that really didn’t give her time for herself; the job played a part in curtailing her excesses a little bit.
Rita woke up again, this time it wasn’t a call that woke her up, but her body. It was acting up. She just had a wet dream. She felt a rising urge in her, filling voids in the upper and lower regions of her body, she didn’t hesitate. She knew what was going on. She was horny. She left the sitting room and got to her bedroom. She dialed Victor’s number. The time was 2.30; she knew victor would help satisfy her through the phone with his calming voice and sweet choice of words to suit the moment. Victor was good at it, these days she always had throwbacks about such experiences than her first sex anyway. She loved the online satisfaction.   
She liked her lifestyle, she always liked standing out of the crowd, she never dreamt of marriage. She wanted to be single all her life. She believed in 50-50. She was a feminist. She was different. Her favorite colour was purple. As she hung up, the urge has died down as usual; she went back to sleep and that day she swore not to go to work even if it did cost her losing her job. She was a man uncensored.  She was a free being.
mcchimefrancis.blogspot.com

CHRISTMAS SHELE

CHRISTMAS SHELE
  I come online one day con see where person post sey Man Utd dey celebrate Christmas party. I con ask myself say, oh! This people don start their own Christmas from first week of November, not even December o... I reason the thing con see sey omo na because sey their economy good.
Nigeria! You go invite person come Christmas party for 1st week of November? The next thing you go hear nah "Hapu ya onweghi sense".
Our economy don bad to the extent sey Christmas don dey loose em shape. Na only few people dey celebrate Christmas wella now. Some people wey no hold money now sef don turn the thing to spiritual waka. You go dey hear things like" my church no dey celebrate Christmas", "dem no born am for December na October den born am".
Before! Before!! I remember wen I dey very small, by November you go don know sey Christmas don dey approach. Na banger you go dey hear everywhere, inside our house our aunty go enter market buy balloons come like this, put am for everywhere. Christmas light go dey on top many trees. People go dey ready to enter village for Christmas. That time on Christmas day na 2 big chicken dem dey kill but now if man see fish make em thank god. But our economy don die sote many people no wan tell their selves the real-real truth.
Now some people go dey sey " Omo me no dey celebrate Christmas , na SIN".
My brother na crime to push brosJ  betday from October go December?
25th na the surest  day to celebrate brosJ betday because e dey very economical and reasonable. My reason. Na sey;
1. You go do two celebration within the same period.
2. Na holiday period naturally.
3. By Calculation according to church, that period suit the history bookers.
So brotherly, leave that ya church thing, hassle, get money and celebrate Christmas oh!
I don start my own preparation from now, for Christmas. I don begin gather my garri, sugar, and groundnut o!
Chicken wey I bin dey train from January 1st just die yesterday nite because of cold. That one na small problem sha. No yawa we go talk more anytime #CFSTour enter ya fellowship.
The truth is bitter, but we don make am make e sweet.
@mcchimefrancis
@CFS_Tour.

THE ATTACK ON FRANCE; An Impression

THE ATTACK ON FRANCE: An Impression
  The World was enlivened once again on a Friday The 13th, as Paris the great capital of France  was rocked with explosions and mass shootings by terrorists numbering to 8.
These actions has once again brought to the world consciousness that even the most secured places are prone to terrorism.
So Many lives have gone due to insurgencies in north-eastern Nigeria for a decade now, and the world powers hasn't shown much interest, but a day of terrorist action in Paris has gotten everyone back to the basics of the need of a secured environment.
Men of peace creating machines of war. They(the terrorist) Have really dropped an impression that they are ready to battle head on and world powers should sit up and face it.
There Can't be a peaceful world without a victorious war.
Nigerians, most importantly its celebrities, and public figures who have taking the #prayforparis hashtag in their strides should also try and replicate it in issues concerning us as a country. Their Energy in supporting international relations should also be utilized nationally to enhance our development.
We are optimistic of a great Nigeria, and not a One Nigeria(in light of Biafra dialogue and protest).
I am Just a simple Comedian using my pen to tell my opinion to the world.
@mcchimefrancis

NIGHT CLASS THINGS

WE BE GUYS

WHAT NOW?

So today i am at the stadium (Francis Ibiam Stadium to be precise). And i am outside watching guys and girls play football together. Some at the other end lifting heavy metals called WEIGHTS. Some other girls squatting-maybe to make their ass protude. Some of them are dancing in groups hoping to loose some weight, and others running around the track in pairs also nursing the same idea in mind. Everyone has come to the stadium today with different reasons, but what is my reason for coming today? NA WOMAN MAKE ME COME O Some persons come into your life like a wind blowing across a tight room. They make you feel they are all you need. They are that perfect icing on your cake, and that makes it all sweet (diabetes free though). And thats what this woman has done to me. A NEW FOUND FRIEND I WOULDNT WANT TO LEAVE So WHAT NOW? Nothing At All, But To Keep Our Fire Burning. @MC_CHIMEFRANCIS

FEELING DOWN

When happy moments become sad times. When you Feel terrible after making others happy. When those who you think loved you are just people who are part of the process. Sad times are never a good thing to experience. Right now i have atleast, what am contented with, but i have lost my sense of hope. What keeps me alive seems not to exist anymore. My heart filled with fears, and i am scared of failing to fufill expectations. I am feeling DOWN.

FEELING DOWN

When happy moments become sad times. When you Feel terrible after making others happy. When those who you think loved you are just people who are part of the process. Sad times are never a good thing to experience. Right now i have atleast, what am contented with, but i have lost my sense of hope. What keeps me alive seems not to exist anymore. My heart filled with fears, and i am scared of failing to fufill expectations. I am feeling DOWN.

THE STATEMENT

“Women should use their 20’s to build their career and marry in their 30’s”-Wendy William This statement has being trending on different social media platform for some time now and I just can’t help but write down what I feel about the statement Wendy William made on my diary today. Wendy William was given birth to on the 18th of July, 1964 and she has being married to Kevin hunter since 1997, Kevin hunter also happens to be Wendy’s manager. Wendy is 50 years old and subtracting her year of birth from the year she got married tells one that she married at the age of 33 (does this mean she is talking from the experience angle?) NO! She isn’t because before she got married to Kevin hunter she had come out from a divorce already. ‘’FROM SOURCE: [in her biography, Wendy, got the heat, she used the pseudonym Robert Morris III to refer to her first husband and describe him as a sales person. William and her first husband got a divorce. She is currently married to Kevin hunter who is also her manager. They have a teenage son also named Kevin.]’’ Wendy basically married in her 20’s if am not mistaken which to me is kind of a contradictory statement if am to relate it with the usual saying “most people don’t practice what they preach” but here in this case I won’t. I see her statement as a geographical one, a statement said based on location. what do I mean by that. It is easier for one to marry at any age over there in the white’s man land. A woman could marry her senior or junior so far he is of the legal age of marriage but comparing that to Africa and from a Nigerian perspective a woman who has to wait till her 30’s is playing the wrong game. I just have two points to make and I’m done. A lady who put her career first in her 20’s is definitely going to go far with hard work and determination, and that also has its own disadvantage. Because in most cases, she would be wealthy than guys her age and that African mentality would come to play which is “a man should be the bread winner of the family”. And at age 20’s most guys are still hustling, trying to make ends meet. Is Linda Ikeji married? No. The Nigerian factor of guys marrying their seniors comes to play again because at age 30 she would definitely be older so she needs to look for a spouse who is in the range of 35 to 40 and guess what at that age most men would have being hooked up already. So the bottom line remains a woman should marry at the right time when love strikes, be it in her 20’s or in her 30’s
Thediaryofofrankleen.wordpress.com @MC_CHIMEFRANCIS

THE 'P'roblem WITH NIGERIA

I know that so many of you might be wondering how it came to be that I now talk about politics. I have a few reasons for doing that though. One of the major reasons I now became interested in politics is because of the nature of the job I do (comedy) and the course I read (science and tech). Another reason I am so interested in political happenings around me is that 2015 is an election year, a year were politics became so competitive that parties began planning for it 3 years ago. Another reason I became so interested in politics is that I wanted to understand the reason why people had to go through the stress of violence, assassination, kidnapping, killings just to hold offices as presidents, governor’s E.T.C I have come to understand that the problems in Nigeria all begin with the first letter of the word in problem which is ‘P’. These problems are POWER, POVERTY, PIRACY, PETROLEUM, POLITICS, PEACE AND PATIENCE (sorry just kidding)…I meant being PATIENT (like having the ability to wait). If we had no PETROLEUM in the country, I guess all our energy would have been channeled to the farm lands and there would have been no one working in shell and being paid millions of naira just for supervision of oil wells (tell me, what are you supervising?) POLITICS and democracy didn’t and wouldn’t move along in Nigeria to be sincere, the price tag attached to these offices all in the name of giving power to the people and providing change has caused us more harm than good. If the president was being paid a 100,000 naira as basic salary like a level 14 school teacher, who would kill just to get to that position. The money is quite enticing I guess. PEACE has left us a long time ago I guess, and sorry to say it would be very difficult for it to return to us. Let us just pray that the outcome of this year’s election would provide that for a while. PATIENCE is what we lack as citizens in Nigeria, the lack of being able to wait has open doors for bribery and corruption and anyone who promises to end corruption is telling a lie(though normally he might not be a liar). Corruption won’t end , you can only reduce it drastically Same as in PIRACY, another major problem eating up funds that would have generated revenues from one of the biggest sectors in Nigeria-the entertainment sector. POWER is something we all need to develop and we lacking it. We need that desperately. POVERTY is a curse, there is a way you would be this poor-poverty herself would send you a text message and it would be like “Nna eh guy how far you?” We need food in this country, and note that a hungry man is an angry man and an angry man can do things he would regret on the long run. The problems are endless and all I solicit for is let us support the new government, be it those giving power to the people or those providing us change. God bless Nigeria, God bless Africa, God bless the universe. Written By @MC_CHIMEFRANCIS

THE CAMPAIGN by Hon. Mr. ChimeFrancis B.eng, M.eng, Gcon, Mfr, HIV

KIM K VS AMBER ROSE: LORD OF THE HIPS

KIM K VS AMBER ROSE: LORDS OF THE HIPS
I was just sitting in class and then i decided to check up my twitter handle ** @MC_CHIMEFRANCIS**, then I stumbled on a tweet;
“hunny you’re also mad the fact that I can have kids and you can’t @khloekardashian”
WOW! That was catchy and I was like who could have tweeted this to khloe? Whole and behold it was @DaRealAmberRose (the official twitter account of Amber Rose).
So after thinking of going into news and entertainment blogging from creative writing, I decided to open my #BloggingTheNews   chapter with this story. **THE KIM K/KHLOE/JENNER VS AMBER TWITFIGHT**
Here are some of the tweets I saw on Kim K timeline;
To begin with a surprising line from Amber rose ex husband wiz khalifa
@kimkkardashhian
WE KNOW
@wizkhalifa “thinking she a prize? She a pie. Everybody get a slice”.”

@kimkkardashhian
Why amber claiming to have moved on but still texting kanye phone?
LORD TAKE THE WHEEL

@kimkkardashhian
He was your God at a time, don’t forget!
“@DaRealAmbRose why is kanye claiming he’s a “god” when he dated an ex whore and is now mar..”

@kimkkardashhian
So why @wizkhalifa just called me and said “don’t fuss with her & ask her when she coming suck my d***

@kimkkardashhian
Who still wants too?
@DaRealAmberRose bitch get out of my mentions, who fucked kanye first lmao?

@kimkkardashhian
How much are you worth again?
@DaRealAmberRose
“BITCH YOUR SISTER GOT MONEY CUZ U MADE A SEXTAPE”
Some of the tweets I saw on ambers TL
@DaRealAmberRose
Why is kanye claiming he’s a “god” when he dated an ex whore and is now married to a woman with a public sex tape?
@DaRealAmberRose
Bitch your fat ass brother can’t even run for 10 minutes @khloekardashian
@DaRealAmberRose
An older woman wwho dates a younger man is a cougar..A n older man who dates a younger woman is a TYGA
@DaRealAmberRose
Do I also need to add that kanye was texting me 2 night before you’re “big wedding” lol. Kim get your ass back on porn-hub
@DaRealAmberRose
And this nigga kanye still trying to text me? He’s ben going at it for 2 hours but can’t even last 2 minutes in bed.

I Guess KIM K is kind of scared loosing kanye to amber rose.  It is quite interesting that people could leak details online though
You could follow me via my twitter handle (@MC_CHIMEFRANCIS) for more details

TMT

AFTER SO MANY YEARS OF DREAMING, FINALLY IT HAS TURNED OUT TO BE A REALITY...
COME FEBUARY 6TH 2015, #FEDERATIONTHEATRE UNN WOULD BRING TO YOU A MIND BLOWING EXPERIENCE [#TMT- THE FIRST IMPRESSION]
IT WOULD BE AN EVENT FOR ALL AGE GRADE, AND ALL INTER-DENOMINATIONS.
IT IS GOING TO BE FUNFILLED..FULL OF ENERGY, FILLED WITH DRAMA,DANCE,MUSIC, AND COMEDY.
AND DEFINITELY ITS A FREE FOR ALL SHOW
VENUE: SEAT OF WISDOM HALL, UNN
TIME: 6PM
WE ARE SET AND BENT ON DELIVERING-FED THEATRE

LOVE AND WAR Ib

END TIME
Things were getting critical, the war was still on and now Joy was nowhere to be found. So many days have gone and I had not being myself. Was she going to die? A question only time could answer. I tried reaching Phillip, his line wasn’t pulling through and I couldn’t reach my dad either, because he was also among the western EPR army. It now dawned on me that I was alone in the world. There was no one to turn to. There was blood shed everywhere, bullet holes through skulls, throats slit by pen knifes, and deaths by physical combat. Now the weather was dim like it was aware about the happenings of the south and the west. It looked like it was going to rain, lightning came then thunder followed. The clouds where gathering ready to pour out its contents. Now I had lost everything nothing was left, the war yet had not ended only God knows when it will.. MIKE! MIKE!! MIKE!!! The voice was familiar-I know that voice.
      

LOVE AND WAR I

IN MY COMFORT ZONE
Those sounds from the cities band across the street woke me up, cleaning my eyes the sounds kept on banging in my ears. I stood up from the bed and did my normal morning routine of ten push-ups (lazy me), then I picked up my phone and called Phillip.
‘Finally, that idiot has being assassinated o’ he laughed, ‘Don’t mind him, his time has finally elapsed you know’.
‘Let us meet by six today, so be at our usual place on time’. And then I hanged up, went to the bathroom, brushed my teeth and took a quick shower.
The whole neighborhood came back to life once more; people had gone back to their different endeavors after many months of curfew imposed by the government, why did the government impose the curfew? It’s a long story though, a very, very long story. The fear of the deadly virus hasn’t being the only reason why the whole community has being indoor, the rising insurgencies has being another reason why most of us were so scared that we made no contact with the outside world. I had not seen Joy for a long time since the curfew started, I had not talk to her on phone because the telecoms service providers mast has being destroyed, courtesy of the last strike from one of the ET MOVEMENT missiles. I remembered It was kind of terrifying that night.
It was a Friday night, and I always invited Joy over to my place, it was a usual quiet time for us and it helped the relationship grow stronger. We actually did not plan to make out anyway but the moment set itself right and that was it, the emotions drew us closer, with her deep blue eyes staring at mine, it was cold shivers down my spine and at that moment her lips came closer to mine, and love was certainly in control. The Gushing emotions and desires were halted when the ET first missile hit a range rover jeep adjacent my apartment BOOM! It was death at my door step, there was no breathing space to enjoy the moment, it was for better- for worse, and she was all over me. Joy was so scared, very scared. Her hug erased the internal cold in me, they gave me courage. I looked at her once deep blue eyes which were now wet, red hot with flames. Those strikes kept coming, to me I was kind off used to it. The whole place was rowdy; people kept running, trying to pick up one or two things. Even pregnant women ran faster than the single ladies I knew, mother’s trying to save their little children and fathers trying to save some of their valuables. Those strikes came at our happiest moment, at that moment I remembered the strike at Nyanya’s park, this was another ET visitation. I kept on running with her like it was a 100m Olympic race, running to nowhere. The whole place was tensed and we kept on running, running and running, going to nowhere.


IN THE CAVES
‘What is going on in this country? I can’t seem to understand all this strikes on civilians by your people’. She said to me.
‘I don’t want to lose you mike, I am scared of loosing you’. Tears were already dropping down her eyes.
‘you won’t lose me, am not going to die, you are not going to die either’, saying this words I was damn scared I just had to look the part and act the part, make her know that I had the courage, but sincerely I was very weak at heart.
Joy had slept, and I was now alone looking at the rocks with tears dropping down my eyes, I tried looking back at what had gone wrong with this great country. Joy was from the southern part of the EPR and I was from the western region of the EPR, too. The southern part and the western part were at war, they hated one another, they hated each other’s religion, each other’s beliefs, nothing the south did seemed right to the north, and nothing the west did seemed right to the south. Though Joy and I were indigenes of the different parts of the divide, we still did not have that enmity between each other. This hatred was one of the reason we had not tied the conjugal knot because her parents were against it, but what mattered most was that we loved each another and we stayed with each other.
I remembered the day I quarreled with Phillip, he was also against it, he always said to me ‘how can you think of marrying someone from the south’ and I would say ‘there is nothing wrong with that, Phillip, there is nothing wrong with it’.
‘There is nothing wrong with it, yet these same southerners killed your mum, and your siblings. There is nothing wrong with it, yet they destroyed your business, your apartment and every valuable of yours’. And I hated his reminders, sometimes it turned into a serious fight. He always wanted me to marry Felicia-my first crush, but though I loved her, she wasn’t just the right girl for me. Felicia was from the west also, but she died during one of the ET’s strike.  The day it happened I felt down, I thought suicide was the best option to take, I was surprised after all that, later on, I was surprised at my concern for her death, anyway, I was still in love with Joy at that time, I was in the mix of two women at some point till she died.
All I had was Phillip-my friend, my dad, and Joy-the love of my life from the south. I was scared of who I was going to lose next. 

HUMAN BEING

HUMAN BEING
Sometimes you see me grab the MIC
And am saying things you might find FUNNY
Smiles on my face but deep down I‘m SAD and in PAINS
ME SEF I BE HUMAN BEING O
I wanted to be this single guy; they were like “how can you still be single?”
When I started dating, they were like “why would you be dating?”
The confusion among them is worrying
ME SEF I BE HUMAN BEING O
Am doing all this, I call it my hobby but you complement
Am I good? Tell me
Am not doing great? Tell me
Am not good at all? Tell me
Don’t pretend, truth is key
ME SEF I BE HUMAN BEING O
Love has never been friendly
I have admired some so deeply that they nearly broke my heart
I have been admired by some so deeply that I couldn’t help but play along
Deep heartbreaks; somebody tell them say I cry.
ME SEF I BE HUMAN BEING O
They have always been there for me
They have supported me this far
They have advised me
They have brought me up to a level because there are levels to these
Some would forget me I know
Some I might forget
No matter how far you all go I would reach you guys
ME SEF I BE HUMAN BEING O
“You get angry easily”
“You talk a lot”
“Short boy”
“You are stingy”
What happened to my good side?
ME SEF I BE HUMAN BEING O
I struggle so hard to be unique; real with my jokes
It Is not easy though I shouldn’t be complaining
Yet, you say I m dry that am not funny
Just because I said the truth about what I felt
What happened to when I was funny?
ME SEF I BE HUMAN BEING O

#shoutOutToMIabagaTufaceSoundsultan HUMAN BEING
Try listen to the song guys
ME SEF I BE HUMAN BEING O
@MC_CHIMEFRANCIS
www.facebook.com/mcchimefrancis
www.mcchimefrancis.blogspot.com

THE REAL LAWMAKERS

THE REAL LAWMAKERS
Am not political to start with, though I just started giving politics a chance, after watching the video clip were lawmakers who are delegated to make laws climb gates and fence, why wouldn’t I be interested in politics? In my own observation I have understood that the best policies can’t be made in the national house of assembly (don’t ask me why, I would explain). If you have ever gone to the ghettos and see where people who take hard drugs popularly called weed or if u have ever been to a workshop were motorcycles are repaired and see people argue politics you would find out that so many policies are raised during their arguments. I always tell people that if you visit a vendor stand where people read political sections in Nigerian newspapers and not just sports, arguing who is better between Eden hazard and Gareth bale you would understand what I mean.
Let me break it down, I went  to a friend’s store recently, when I got there I met my friend and his guys passing weed around, and you know, places like that their conversations never correlate, you would hear things like this;
MARK: Omo, so after Christmas na Easter ooo?
JOHN: guy, imagine ooo, so dem don call off -Asuu strike?
Then you begin to imagine what concerns Easter with Asuu calling off strike? Well back to the matter, at my friends store their discussions correlated to a point, and it was about Nigerian politics my new found love. (So before I outlay the dialogue that went on among us the weed smokers-mind you I don’t do drugs neither do I take alcohol, I was just moping like novice ni o).  I understand the difference between deliberations at the house of assembly and the deliberations at the house of weed smokers, the difference is that at the house of assembly, everyone brings out a problem and different solutions but the ‘’eyes have it” and “neighs have it” closes the chapter, but, at the house of weed smokers, mechanic workshops and newspaper vendor stand different people bring problems and different people bring different  solutions to solve the problems (Lol! you might not understand sha).
Now back to the dialogue at my friend’s store, it began like this…
My friend sniffed his wrapped weed band said:
MY FRIEND: guy, the insecurity wey dey this country na die o, nothing dey safe for here, imagine were for secured oyibo land, airplane dey loss talk-more of here wey security no even dey (he passed the weed over to his other friend who replied).
OTHER FRIEND: Ma guy WAEC go soon start again o, another mass failure again. This country eh(he passed it to the last guy and he sniffed the weed and said).
LAST GUY: Abeg, una never still get light for here abi, (I looked around sha, wetin dem wan use light do for were dem dey sniff weed? Na wa for government o, dem no dey try at all-at all (he passed it back to my friend).
Now the next dialogue came with solutions which I observed fervently.
MY FRIEND: Guy if dem fit just tell each state to get one big generator wey go dey give us light e go good oo, buh my broad na to get ur own gen sure pass, and make people sef try to dey pay nepa bills gaan.
LAST GUY: Guy u c eh, if all man get em own gun, naija go dey safe gaan o. Thief no fit rob thief na.
OTHER GUY: If I fit just see 100k for ground eh (I was wondering who would misplace such amount of money and how does that solve Nigeria educational issues).
I can’t remember how I left the place but all I can recollect is that I took some wraps of the weed. Well that is a story for another day anyway (it dealt with me sha). It is only a smart mind that would understand this story, the truth remains that our law makers, senators and persons in the judiciary are not impressive at all. Let them try to improve on their policy making and not just borrowing policies that work in other nations but won’t work in Nigeria, and please also give the youth a chance to exercise their ideas too. We are tired of policies thought out by tired aged brains
*drops pen and jumps on my lady*
#DerivingJoy2015
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Written by @MC_CHIMEFRANCIS